In our house and as an organization, we come together in a circle to talk about all sorts of things. Sometimes we circle simply to talk about how the day went, or house plans for the evening, or a big event coming up the next week. The purpose of a circle is to give everyone a voice and to place everyone on an even playing field.
We also circle up to work through problems and issues in the home. Our kids are often agitated when this happens. Many come from environments and home lives where you don't talk through problems. They may have years and years of simply ignoring problems, using fists instead of words, or when they do use words, they are hateful, hurtful, and make things worse. So, circling up to talk positively through problems can be frustrating to them because
1) it isn't easy,
2) it takes time,
3) they aren't used to it, and
4) our kids may have to circle up 4 or 5 times some days.
But despite the occasional frustration on a teens part, circles are a great thing. Circles bring accountability, communication, and when used to deal with problems, talking it through can often lead to the solution.
I love this. I had the same problems (and still do) of talking out problems calmly and not ignoring them. I love the idea of a circle and coming together. You guys are doing great - I really loved reading the story about the roommate and snores-a-lot. I love you both.
ReplyDeleteThanks Jo...we love you too!
ReplyDeleteThis is great. During the 4 wks. I taught at Cedar Ridge last summer, I observed the counselors and teens do this a lot. It was amazing to me how the kids would start to influence each other to do the right thing, given enough supervision and correction. It's hard work, and I'm proud of you, Jon.
ReplyDeleteP.S. Morgan & I have both been "fired" as roommates because of snoring! Him at OSU, and me at a motel in Lawton where I was teaching :-)
Carol